Once upon a time I met a dark, South American stranger…
I am sure it’s not only me who finds a dark eyed stranger with a cute foreign accent incredibly intoxicating…especially if you’re already intoxicated.
Living abroad is one of the best ways in which to open your mind (and perhaps other parts of your anatomy) to people from different backgrounds and cultures. Indeed, this experience taught me so many things, allowed me to meet friends from all walks of life and collect a few stories or two that it would probably be best not to tell the grandkids.
When you live abroad you often get so caught up in all your adventures that you forget how much you miss home until something all of a sudden hits you and you’re reminded of what you’ve left behind.
For me this happened on St Patrick’s Day last year when I went to the local Irish bar to hear the “Irish” folk group (which was made up solely of Italians). After a couple of pints of Guinness they played “The Foggy Dew” and I began to feel all sentimental and downed a few more drinks.
For those who know me well, after a few drinks I am an outrageous flirt and love nothing more than to keep the party going until the wee small hours. When it was clear that the St Paddy’s Day festivities were over I invited my friend and a bunch of strangers back to my flat to continue the drinking.
Amongst the party was a Brazilian. Naturally, the flirt in me came out and also in the Brazilian.
However, no amount of booze would have made what happened next acceptable….for either party.
After the wine was gone we cracked out the salt, lime and tequila. The Brazilian takes my hand, kisses it and then…licked it! Licked it whilst giving me the come hither eyes before pouring the salt on in preparation for the shot.
I was totally aghast. I didn’t know whether to laugh or be sick.
Thankfully, I laughed.
And continued laughing.
To the point that whenever this poor chap tried to make a move I would burst out into fits of hysterical laughter.
It goes without saying, that nothing further happened that night as it is quite impossible to get laid when you’re laughing so hard in the face of the guy trying to kiss you.
Woooops. Brazil is still to be crossed off my list.